Today’s post comes courtesy of the wonderful Cara Sutra. Be sure to leave comments for her here and go visit her website!

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What’s so sexy about spanking and bondage?

Did you know that some people love to get spanked? What’s more, some people love to get tied up and restrained! How could this possibly be enjoyable? What do these people get out of it? Are these activities that you could see yourself enjoying, whether on a purely physical or a sexual level too?

The times when spanking and bondage were seen as the territory of socially hidden, barely tolerated ‘perverts’ are now, thankfully, far behind us. Kink and BDSM activities and relationships were enjoying a natural evolution into the limelight, however, the Fifty Shades of Grey tsunami has seen an overwhelming surge in popularity of spanking and bondage activities in particular.

There are a few elements of spanking which deserve our more in-depth consideration, as to why they would be enjoyable and even arousing for those involved. For the recipient of erotic spanking, the position they are in during the spanking session needs to be one of exposure and vulnerability. This calls to an inner desire to be at least sexually submissive, even if the person is not submissive in other areas of life. For others, being spanked is the realisation of their masochistic desires.

The beauty of spanking, as the common entryway to BDSM and Fetish, is that it can be delivered as gently or as firmly as the deliverer and recipient requires. There’s no need to jump straight in at the deep end, with the stinging effects of canes and crops; a spanking delivered by hand can be a very erotic, pleasurable and intimate experience. Spanking may have sexual connotations, but can be just as much an activity enjoyed by a non-sexual partnership within the realms of BDSM and power exchange.

For the person giving the spanking, they enjoy having the power and control of both the delivery of a firm spank either by hand or chosen implement, as well as satisfying the kinky desires of the one being spanked.

Bondage, on the other hand, is the experience of either restraining someone or being restrained, for pleasurable purposes. Furry handcuffs are amongst the better known bondage devices in terms of kinky and sexual roleplay, but bondage sex toys have come a long way since these fairly novelty and often, not too practical items.

Now, participants in bondage sessions and sexual roleplay can experiment with leather wrist cuffs and ankle cuffs, spreader bars, beautiful Shibari bondage or suspension bondage with bondage rope, sensory deprivation hoods and masks as well as the more extreme metal and chain restraints available. Ankle and wrist cuffs may be made from leather, neoprene, even silicone, and fasten with either quick release triggers and non-intimidating velcro, or heavy duty buckles which can even be locked with a padlock for more extreme players.

Active bondage (that is, using devices and sex toys to physically restrain a partner) results in very dramatic sensations and emotions being experienced by the person bound. Being physically unable to move puts one in a vulnerable position and frame of mind. The predicament one finds themselves in once in bondage leaves them at the mercy of their partner, meaning they have to trust that person implicitly. Sexual activity performed with or on a bound person absolves the one in bondage of all active choices and any possible guilt relating to those actions.

Of course, as with all activity and roleplay within bondage and BDSM, participants in the scene should set a safeword before engaging in the session. This ensures that all actions are mutually consensual, for both the one in control of the session (the Top, Dominant, Master or Mistress) as well as for the one receiving the orders or actions (the bottom, submissive or slave).  A safeword should be a word that would not otherwise be said in a sexual or kink scene, so that once uttered, the person delivering the actions knows that the scene needs to stop immediately, for the safety and welfare (mental or physical) of the other person.

Spanking and bondage are powerful ways to increase intimacy between couples, whether in a sexual and romantic relationship or within the context of a BDSM power exchange relationship. The scope for achieving pleasure using spanking and bondage techniques is limited only by the participants imaginations. If you find yourself in need of more ideas, watching adult educational videos such as The Art of Erotic Spanking and Bondage DVD from Loving Sex can help to give you the invaluable inspiration you need.

In summary, there are levels of sexy spanking and delicious bondage to appeal to people at any place on the kink and BDSM spectrum. For those new to spanking and bondage, it’s simple to ease into matters with hand spankings or quick release wrist cuffs. For more experienced players, there are always methods to level up your kinky adventures.

No matter how intimate and intoxicating a kinky encounter you’re ready for, spanking and bondage provides a way to realise and satisfy your shared desires.

- Cara Sutra

Image sources: Getty, This is Book’s Music

 

 

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