Sexuality Help

ABORTION
The termination of a pregnancy by the loss or removal of the fetus before it can sustain itself outside the womb is an abortion. There are two major categories of abortion. The most common type is the spontaneous abortion, called miscarriage if it occurs during the first few weeks of pregnancy. It is the natural rejection of a fetus by the body. The second category is artificially induced abortions. First trimester abortions are a safe, legal medical procedure. Medical abortions can be done using established medical procedures by a trained practitioner or using accepted drugs and hormones. Among the newest abortion drugs available in the U.S. is RU-486. Abortion is, without doubt, an extremely controversial topic.

ANAL SEX
Anal sex is the stimulation of the highly responsive nerve endings of the anus manually, orally or through sexual intercourse. In some states in the U.S., this activity is illegal under sodomy laws although it is rarely prosecuted, especially when heterosexual couples are involved. Obviously, some like it and some don't. It's strictly a matter of personal preference. If you do decide to try it, be sure to communicate clearly with your partner and use plenty of lubrication. Also proceed slowly, use good hygiene and a condom, and remember that some STD's, like HIV, are easily transmitted this way.
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APHRODISIAC
Any food, drink, drug, scent, natural nutritional supplement or device that can arouse or increase sexual desire is considered an aphrodisiac. Aphrodisiacs mimic or stimulate the physiological effects of sexual response. For example, chilies, curries, and other spicy foods have been viewed as aphrodisiacs because of their ability to elevate heart rates and induce sweating (similar physical reactions to those experienced during sex). Many ancient people believed in the so-called "law of similarity," reasoning that objects resembling human genitalia may have sexual powers. Ginseng, meaning "man root", has been looked on as an invigorating and rejuvenating agent for centuries in China, Tibet, Korea, Indochina, and India. Sharing their origin with the goddess Aphrodite, oysters have also had a long-standing mystique for providing an increased sexual appetite. Today there are many products that claim to boost sexual drive or libido. Some are safe, and others can be harmful. Look for products that have been clinically tested. Avoid those advertised as "novelty" items.

BIRTH CONTROL
Any conscious attempt to prevent pregnancy or the subsequent birth of a child would be considered birth control. There are a wide variety of ways to do this. Birth control methods or products are designed specifically for either males or females. A common birth control method used by females in the U. S. is the pill, or oral contraceptive. It is generally considered safe and very effective at preventing pregnancy. However, it offers no protection against Sexually Transmitted Diseases. Condoms, which predominate in use among males, are excellent protection from STD's but are only effective against conception when used properly. For example, you must avoid breakage (user failure accounts for most condom failure, including breaking or slippage), use them before penetration and exercise caution upon exit from the vagina. Other popular contraceptives include Depo Provera, diaphragms, and the surgical procedures of vasectomy and tubal ligation. With so many choices, at varying prices, this is something that you should discuss with experts in the field such as a physician or gynecologist.
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BREASTS
These are a highly erotic part of the anatomy of both males and females. Located on the exterior of the chest, these mounds of sensual flesh abound with sensitive and responsive nerve endings. In Western cultures, especially in the U. S., many men like to gaze at women's breasts and caress or fondle them during sexual activity. In some Western cultures, men are more attracted to large breasts in women. In fact, breast implants using silicon or other materials are very popular. There is, however, no credible evidence that shows increased sexual response in women with large breasts.

CLITORIS
A small elongated organ at the front of the vulva that gets erect upon stimulation. It is similar in some ways with the penis. A common terminology is simply "clit." The head (or glans) of the clitoris is just inside and below where the inner labia meet at the top, and is covered with a small fold of skin. Hooded by skin, it looks like a tiny dot to the naked eye, but in fact, most of the clitoris is internal, not external. If you are a male, be sure to ask your partner how she likes her clitoris stimulated. Some women find clitoral stimulation absolutely necessary in order to reach orgasm. Others are able to orgasm with a minimal amount and achieve this peak more easily through penetrative sex (penis-in-vagina) and thrusting.
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EJACULATION
A sudden discharging of seminal fluid from the man's penis commonly associated with orgasm. If ejaculation occurs while engaged in sexual intercourse, sperm is inserted into the female's vaginal canal and can lead to conception. Squirting or ejaculation may also occur to some extent from the woman's vagina through her urinary opening when she is highly stimulated from her G-spot area. There are various opposing professional opinions regarding female ejaculation and the existence of the G-spot.

ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION
This is the inability by some men to produce or maintain an erection, also known as "get it up," or "keep it up." Its causes are generally thought to be physical or psychological or a combination of both. It is a malady that can generally be treated and solved. Psychological causes can be treated through the use of techniques such as changing the time of day during which you engage in sex and the "stuff technique." Physical problems can be treated with surgically or medically prescribed implants, and/or injection therapy. Solutions like Viagra may be prescribed by your doctor to sustain an erection.
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ERECTION
This state of the male penis, commonly known as a "hard on," or a "boner," refers to the swelling or stiffness that comes from the increased blood flow to the area during sexual stimulation. This state is generally necessary in order to achieve penetration. The inability to achieve an erection is called Erectile Dysfunciton or "ED." A state of erection can also be seen in a woman's nipples and clitoris during sexual arousal.

EROGENOUS ZONES
Erogenous zones are any body part that is especially sensitive to stimulation during sexual activity. Most any area of the skin can be classified as an erogenous zone. The genital area is an obvious erogenous zone. One place that may not be so obvious is the perineum. This is the small area below the anus that stretches to the vagina in a woman and to the testicles in a man. Erogenous zones are highly unique in each individual and represent an aspect of you and your partner's lovemaking that will constantly provide new areas for exploration and enjoyment. Some individuals respond sexually to the simplest touch or even the blowing of breath on publicly exposed areas of the body.

FANTASY
Sexual fantasy is a type of dream or imagining that arouses you to sexual desire or activity. Fantasy can involve real or imaginary people or situations. It can also include past experiences. Fantasy can be used as a great tool for arousal and to spice up your sex life. You can use fantasy to come up with situations for you and your partner to role-play. Try browsing a lingerie catalog for fantasy costumes that you or your partner can wear to stimulate arousal.
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FOREPLAY
Foreplay can be considered any kind of erotic stimulation that precedes and arouses sexual intercourse. It often starts outside the bedroom and long before the physical activity begins. It can include activities such as kissing, caressing and massage. Intended to awaken the mind and body for sexual response, foreplay does not need be confined to the obvious physical erogenous zones (penis, nipples, clitoris) of the body. In fact, the mind or the imagination is the best area to be "touched" during foreplay.

G-SPOT
First recognized by gynecologist Ernst Grafenberg, the G-spot is an area of soft, often ridgy tissue, about the size of a dime, located inside the vagina about one third up on the upper wall. Many women reportedly notice an urge to urinate when the spot is initially stimulated. Some go on to achieve orgasm, expelling a fluid from the urinary opening along with the orgasmic contractions. Indirect stimulation of the G-spot through the vaginal walls sometimes results in a woman's ejaculation also. Many researchers also believe it may be the internal sponge located behind the front vaginal wall.
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HORMONES
Hormones are chemical substances produced by the body that alter moods along with sexual and reproductive functions. The major classes of sex hormones are estrogens and androgens. These are present to some degree in both males and females although their amounts differ significantly between the sexes. Estrogens are produced in a female's ovaries and regulate a variety of functions, including menstruation. It is thought that estrogens have little to do with the level of sexual desire; however, the most commonly known male androgen, testosterone, does influence levels of sexual desire. Testosterone also occurs in women, though in lesser concentrations, and produces similar results naturally or through use as a prescribed supplement. One's age and overall health can greatly affect hormone levels and thus, sexual desire and ability. For example, the onset of menopause can affect estrogen levels and consequently, the amount of vaginal lubrication. Estrogen replacement therapy is often recommended. Men can also experience lower levels of testosterone as they age. It is unclear, though, whether testosterone replacement therapy is effective.

INTERCOURSE
In the strictest sense of the word, intercourse refers to the insertion of the male penis into the female vagina. However, in today's world, it could also be associated with both anal and oral penetration. Regardless of the manner in which it is done, intercourse is often followed by orgasm. If intercourse is vaginal, it could lead to conception.
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KAMA SUTRA
One of the original sex manuals or how-to books is the Kama Sutra. Vatsyayana wrote it in India around the 4th century. It contains a variety of information on all aspects of courting and marriage from dress to sexual foreplay to orgasm. One of the more interesting aspects of this volume is the section on sexual positions and techniques. If you want to add variety and spice to your love life, this is a good place to start.

LIBIDO
This is the fancy term for your sex drive. If you desire sex or have the urge to mate, you have a libido. This is the engine, so to speak, that drives all your sexual activity. The basis for your libido is physically rooted in hormones. However, it is greatly shaped by your environment, culture and your age. For example, the sex drive of males peaks in their early twenties and declines thereafter. Also, some religions approve of sex only for reproduction, a concept that can put a damper on libido. Libido can be enhanced by authentic aphrodisiacs and influenced by the perceived anticipated benefits from taking them.

LUBRICATION
These are the oils, creams, lotions and secretions that lessen the friction that can lead to painful sexual intercourse. When the body does it naturally due to sexual arousal, we commonly call this, "getting wet." During menopause, some women will notice a decrease in their ability to do this naturally. There are plenty of commercially available products that can mimic the benefits of natural secretions.
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MASTURBATION
Commonly known as pleasuring yourself or "playing with yourself," masturbation is simply stimulating yourself to orgasm. This is one of the most common forms of sexual activity in both males and females. It is generally considered safe and harmless although there have been historical taboos against it in certain cultures. Masturbation can be such a pleasurable experience that people even do it when they are involved in a sexual relationship with another person. This is not unusual and is not damaging to the relationship when there is effective communication between partners. In fact, many couples enjoy some form of mutual masturbation.

MATURITY AND SEX
Maturity brings with it different goals and values in all aspects of life including sexuality. Although sexuality is a natural part of being human throughout life, sexual behaviors and attitudes change as we change over the years. People like to be touched and hugged no matter what their age. Affection and closeness are important to everyone's health.

As men get older they may take longer to get an erection and longer to achieve orgasm, or "come". Some orgasms are internal, that is, they happen without the ejaculation of semen. Worrying about changes in sexual response can make the response slower. Nearly every man faces the lack of erection at times. This is normal, and usually temporary. Men may try other types of sexual activities if they no longer rely on an erection.

A woman's vagina may become somewhat stretched after having children. It becomes less elastic and dryer as she reaches menopause. Water-soluble lubricants, available at drug stores, can help prevent pain or discomfort during intercourse.

Both men and women are usually able to come to climax and have orgasms all their lives. Some older couples find that not having to worry about pregnancy makes sex more enjoyable. After children have left home there is more privacy. More relaxed lovemaking can mean more imaginative techniques and more creative expressions of intimacy.
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MENOPAUSE
A period of physical transition that all women undergo generally in their late 40's and early 50's. The hormonal changes associated with menopause cause additional sexual and emotional challenges. Some women experience this transition period smoothly while others undergo extreme discomfort in a variety of ways. This is the time when a woman loses her periods and may experience hot flashes. It does not, however, mean the end of sex. Quite the opposite, many women feel increased sexual desires after this period of time. A gynecologist can help smooth this transition. However, you should be prepared in advance with the questions you want to ask before going to see your doctor.

MENSTRUATION
A woman's monthly period that starts at puberty and ends with the onset of menopause. It generally lasts from five to seven days. The level of comfort or discomfort associated with this time of the month varies from individual to individual. There are also some taboos and myths associated with sexual intercourse during this time. However, some women report feeling aroused during their period. There is no physical reason why you cannot have sexual intercourse during menstruation. In fact some women report that it helps to relieve some of the discomfort they feel. Conception is very unlikely, but still may occur during the menstrual period.

ORAL SEX
This is a type of sexual activity that involves the use of your mouth to stimulate your sexual partner. It is also considered in the definition of sodomy and therefore illegal, although rarely prosecuted, in some states. Cunnilingus is when a man performs this on a woman. The opposite is called fellatio. Those who find this pleasurable do so either mutually or one at a time. The pleasure here is derived using a variety of speed, pressure and motion. What each person likes or dislikes varies, so communicate clearly when engaged in these activities.
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ORGASM
The peak of sexual excitement is generally known as orgasm. Other terms for this state are "climaxing" and "coming." There are both physical and emotional releases at this point. The ways that people experience orgasm are as unique as any aspect of their being. For example, some women do not achieve orgasm yet they are very satisfied with their sex life simply because they enjoy the process as much as anything. Men, on the other hand, may feel unfulfilled without ejaculation.

A primary difference between men and women with regard to orgasm is the concept of multiple orgasms, the physical ability to experience more than one orgasm without dropping below the plateau of sexual arousal. Fewer men than woman can experience this. This is due mainly to the fact that men have a refractory or recovery period after orgasm. During this time, a man cannot physically have an orgasm. Women, however, do not have such a period, and can, with the right level of interest and continued stimulation, reach continual orgasms.

PENIS
The penis is the primary male sex organ. Like the female vagina, the penis is loaded with nerve endings and therefore very responsive to sexual stimulation. Most of this sensitivity is centered in the head or glans and the small region on the underside just below the head. Every penis is unique in color, shape, presence of foreskin or not, and size.

Penis size is always a concern to men regardless of age. However, size is totally unrelated to weight, physique, or the size of appendages like the hands, feet or nose. The average penis in its non-erect or flaccid state is 3" to 41/2" in length and average about 1" in diameter. The erect state tends to make all men about equal in that a smaller flaccid penis will tend to have a larger percentage volume increase.

PORNOGRAPHY
Regardless of the way you define this, someone will disagree. This is one definition that is all in the eye of the beholder. With that stated, one could say that it is material that is explicit and designed exclusively to stimulate sexual arousal. The so-called "hard-core porn" leaves nothing to the imagination and often includes a certain "shock value." Soft porn, while also explicit, often seeks to tell some story and will frequently seek to hide or imply the presence of genitals and penetration. Erotica is often the term for pornography with softer imagery.
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PREMATURE EJACULATION
Also known as Early Ejaculation. This occurs when a man ejaculates earlier than he or his partner desires. What is too early depends on what the expectations of the man and or his partner thinks is too early. It is generally caused by not being aware of and able to control the stimulation that immediately precedes ejaculation. It is rarely a physical problem and more often than not a psychological one.

Since this is most often a psychological problem, the real "cure" is to recognize that feeling that you get as a man just before you reach the point of no return. To do this you have to slow down the process and pay close attention to feelings and sensation. Physically based premature ejaculation can be solved using such techniques as the "squeeze" method or wearing a penis ring.

PROSTATE
The male gland that surrounds the urethra and the neck of the bladder. It is a significant part of the male reproductive system due in part to the secretions from it that are a part of the seminal fluid. Many men derive pleasure from the stimulation of this gland. This can be done through touching inside the anus or on the perineum.
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S & M
A shortened form of the word sadomasochism that is a combination of the words, "sadism and masochism." When you derive pleasure from inflicting pain or disciplining another you are said to be a sadist. A masochist would derive pleasure from receiving pain or humiliation. This can be an extreme form of sexual activity. However, most participants stay within mutually agreed upon, predetermined limits. They use it as a game or in role-playing situations that may vary with one person dominating on some occasions and being submissive on other occasions.

SEX TOYS
Any object used to arouse or enhance sexual pleasure or orgasm. Thus they can vary from person to person and are limited only by your imagination. Toys can be regular household objects converted for sexual purposes. These would include things like a spatula used for light "spanking" or a duster used for titillation during a massage. Commercially designed toys include vibrators, dildos and handcuffs that can be used in bondage fantasies.

SEXUAL POSITIONS
If you want to improve your sexual positions we recommend that you use sex pillows. You can find reviews of the best products at bedbible

This refers to the infinite variety of ways in which couples position themselves to engage in sexual intercourse. Even though the possibilities are endless, all of the positions distill down to variations on a handful. These include man-on-top, woman-on-top, side-by-side, and rear-entry. You can achieve variations on all of these performing them lying down, sitting, standing, kneeling, or even some combination.

What is best for you depends on the personal preferences of both you and your partner and your desire and need for variety, penetration, and comfort.

• ASEXUAL
  One who abstains from sexual activity or has a low level of such involvement.
• BISEXUAL
  A bisexual is a person who is equally aroused by both males and females.
• GAY
  This is a term used to describe men who are sexually attracted to other men.
• HOMOSEXUAL
  A broad designation for all people, regardless of gender, who exclusively engage in sexual acts performed between members of the same sex. See Gay and Lesbian.
• HETEROSEXUAL
  A designation for people who exclusively engage in sexual acts performed between members of opposite sexes.
• LESBIAN
  These are women who are attracted to and have sexual relations exclusively with other women.

TANTRA
This is a sexual path to a higher consciousness that has its roots in India. Tantric lovers see orgasm as a spiritual experience. Therefore, those who engage in this practice will slow down their lovemaking, prolong their arousal, and look to increase awareness of the feelings, emotions and sensations of lovemaking. To achieve this awareness you need to incorporate breath control, meditation and work with your posture and finger pressure. Both partners need to be active in prolonging enjoyment before orgasm.

VAGINA
The vagina is the primary female sex organ. This is where a man places his penis during intercourse and the entrance passage to the woman's cervix and ultimately her womb. The vagina is loaded with nerve endings. These are predominately in the front third, and thus this is the area most responsive to male stimulation during intercourse. This also makes the length of a man's penis irrelevant physically. The vagina can expand or contract depending upon the state of sexual arousal or during childbirth. Though many women enjoy the sensation of "containment" of her male partner's penis (or object or toy), the penis diameter and length are certainly not the only criteria that matter.
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